It’s that time of year again, when everyone gets together, stays indoors, and eats a bunch of food while watching the TV. It sounds like Thanksgiving again, but it is actually Super Bowl season. However, I’m not a sports fan even when it comes to football.
So what sport am I talking about then?
Well obviously, the Puppy Bowl, one of the greatest annual events to ever happen. For those of you that may not know, the Puppy Bowl is a parody of the Super Bowl where a bunch of puppies “play” football.
It’s basically a bunch of puppies running around playing with each other with sports commentary.
Over the years they added more things to the puppy bowl—the kitty halftime show, the hamster blimp, and they have full-blown teams with line-ups to really make it feel like a real sports event.
The two teams that made it to the Puppy Bowl this year are teams Fluff and Ruff. My opinion is that team Fluff will take this year’s Puppy Bowl.
The starting lineup for team Fluff included a couple of their greatest players, such as quarter-pup Arron Pawdger and defensive line-dog Chunky Monkey. Pawdger’s is a pun on the athlete Aaron Rodgers.
If I’ve learned anything from sports movies (i.e., Space Jam and The Game Plan), it’s if you invoke the athlete, you will gain their athletic abilities.
Puns are some of the most powerful aspects of speech. This dog has the powers of an athlete and would no doubt give Air Bud a run for his dog biscuits.
Next up we have the fluffiest defensive line-dog, Chunky Monkey. Chunky Monkey has the fluff factor, which is the best factor to have for the defensive line-dog.
It instills an intimidation to the other team as well as making him extremely adorable. Plus, his name is Chunky Monkey, how could you not root for a team that has a dog named Chunky Monkey?
Although they aren’t on the starting lineup, other team members deserve to mentioned because they are vital members of team Fluff. We have running bark Bananaberry, whose name is equally as adorable as Chunky Monkey’s.
Then we have the three-time puppy-ball’s most valuable pup, Jett. Jett is the most devoted pup this game has ever seen. He is Fluff’s main wide retriever. He is also a double amputee with wheels for his front paws.
We’ve all seen dogs chase cars, but what if the dog was part car?
Jett runs exclusively on puppy energy and is the fastest moving object when the ball is thrown. Jett borderline teleports to the final destination.
This dog is the happiest pup on wheels I’ve ever seen, and he does it all for the love of the game.
I will say team Ruff does have some good picks on their side too. We have our wide retriever Pauly, front line-dog Gus, and running bark Lucy.
Pauly is just the all-time athlete pup. Pauly got rookie of the year his first appearance with more than 150 retrieves for team Ruff. Over the years, Pauly has refined his skills leading up to his debut for the Puppy Bowl.
Gus may not look like much, but the beagle cocker spaniel mix will take you down with ferocity, smugness and just plain adorableness. He’s gotten more puppy tackles than most fluffy pups. He will definitely be one to watch out for.
Then we have the running bark, Lucy. This little pup is cunning and will sneak right past anyone if needed. She’s got beagle energy mixed with blueticks, which gives her a deadly combo that will leave opponents bamboozled.
Overall, both teams have their options, but I’ve got to give the edge to team Fluff. They have the big names, Chunky Monkey and Jett. By the time this comes out the Puppy Bowl will have concluded, and I have no doubt team Fluff has won.
Correction: In an earlier version of this story, Aaron Rogers name was misspelled.